When it's hard to talk...

From time to time, every supervisor is put into a position where they need to have a difficult conversation with an employee, and the reverse is true as well. Employees find themselves in situations where a less than comfortable conversation has to happen with the boss.

It's often at this point where emotions and nerves start to get in the way.  We play the conversations out in our minds before they happen and we see the worst case scenarios.  We envision the other person getting furious, we see ourselves losing our cool, and the whole situation will go from uncomfortable to disasterous.

Perhaps that happens because we are focusing on the emotions more than the issues.  How different would the conversation be if it centered on the things we are trying to accomplish together rather than how we feel.  A few scattered thoughts...

• It takes maturity and effort to focus on issues rather than feelings.  So don't expect it to be easy. 
• Remember that the conversation is not about winning and losing.  It's not a debate.  It's about doing the right thing.
• There is often more than one right answer in every situation. Just because the answer isn't yours, doesn't mean it's wrong. 
• You can only control your own emotions and behaviour.  You can't do that for the others involved. Don't even try.  
• Keep the conversation on one topic. Don't bring a bunch of other issues and baggage into it. That's not fair.   One thing at a time. 

For some the inability to follow leadership is the biggest single struggle of their career.  For others, the failure to effectively lead is the limiting issue.   And one side seems to always blame the other.  At the end of the day, if we focus on our goals and targets, rather than who wins or loses we'll be moving forward.  

That's what's most important. 

Vive la Difference

I've spent some time recently thinking about the many different types of people we work with every day. Some are self conscious and shy, while others are confident and boisterous. Some are very mainstream, and others march to the beat of their own drum. Some have lots of experience and talent, and others are just starting out.

To quote Dr. Seuss, “Black fish, blue fish, old fish, new fish”, we have them all, and they all deserve respect. I'm not sure they always get it.

Some are laughed at behind their backs or chewed up in a rumor mill fueled more by opinion than fact. Some are mocked because their talent hasn't fully blossomed yet. Some are left out because they are different.

In many places today is “Anti-Bullying Day” at the local schools. The kids are dressed in pink and taking a stand. The lessons of respect and tolerance are being taught.

As leaders, we need to emulate that same attitude. The kids have it right, and as another great writer once said, “And a little child shall lead them”.

Playin' in the Band

In our little corner of the world this is the week of the annual Moose Jaw Band and Choral Festival.  Here is this mornings performance of the Grade 6 band from Sunningdale doing "Ode to Joy".  Ludwig never sounded so good!!

Jake is on bass drum.  I asked him if Joy was a nice girl and if she really deserved her own "ode".  He turned and walked away, shaking his head.

It's Friday!!

Paul Harvey used to utter these marvelous words at the dawn of each weekend.  They brought hope, happiness, and the promise of boundless fun.  As we roll into another weekend, a few more thoughts on what "It's Friday" means.....

• Weekends are like rainbows.  They look great from a distance but disappear when you get close to them.
• Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday.
• Middle age is when you sit home on a Friday night, and when the phone rings, you hope it's not for you.
• Give a man a fish and he has food for a day.  Teach a man to fish and he can be busy and entire weekend.

It's Friday!!